Aren't they just so precious?!?! That's Brody on the left and Franimal on the right. You probably can't tell from this photo but Brody is twice Fran's size...she is 25 pounds and he's right around 50. They are the loves of our lives...they have melted the hearts of the four St. George's and they are slowly melting the hearts of our friends and family who get a lot of time with them...but it takes time, especially with that little Fran!!!!
Ok so these pups can contribute to my anxiety for sure, as I wrote about in my blog yesterday. But I can't blame it all on the actions of these little fuzz balls! Though I can get stressed (easily and often) by the things I wrote about yesterday, they aren't the ONLY things that cause me anxiety.
It was probably just much easier to write about the pups instead of the human things...hmmmm...
When I try to bring to mind some of the things that cause me to feel anxious I think of the situations that sort of stop me in my tracks, give me the "hot" in my chest/gut, cause me fuzzy brain and flush my cheeks...those are the physical sensations I experience when I'm triggered. When I feel these things I ask myself what is going on...generally it's not because I'm overwhelmed with happiness...so I'm probably either mad, sad or scared.
Anger is very rarely my true emotion, I can honestly say that I only truly feel mad when I'm receiving poor customer service. When I drill down and really explore what's at the core of my emotion, it's usually sadness or fear. Both of these emotions bring out the anxiety in me...so when do I feel those emotions...???
When I make up stories about what I think others were doing/thinking (plotting/scheming) or why they were doing it, I feel anxious. Uncertainty. Scary. Fear. Usually this can be cured by asking questions to clarify what's going on. And usually, my negative assumptions are wrong. This makes questioning for understanding so important and so worth it - even when it's hard.
When I am in the presence of people who seem angry or are saying hurtful things I get very anxious. I wonder why people are so unhappy that they would say mean things. I need to state the fact that I'm feeling anxious before I can move through it. I need to take a few deep breaths before I can move through it.
When the people I love and care about do things that I find hurtful I get anxious, and that's sad or fear based. Afraid their love for me has changed or gone away, and saddened by that possibility. When I'm feeling this way I need to let them know - in a non-aggressive way - they've hurt my feelings . I need to communicate to them how I've been hurt and let them know what I need in order to heal.
I bet standing up on a stage and having to address hundreds of people would also cause me anxiety, since standing up in front of 10 people usually causes me anxiety. This is fear-based and they best way I know to move through that anxiety is to state the fear..."I need to let you guys know I'm nervous right now so please bear with me!"
Feeling anxious is something many of us experience and in all different types of situations. What are some of the tips and tricks you have to help you work through your anxiety? We could all benefit from growing our bag of tricks!
Happy Friday!
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