I turned 40 this week and that seems like a pretty grown-up number...I don't feel very grown up at all, I feel playful, young, loving and refreshingly not too serious!
I just adjusted my nameplate and my coffee mug full of pens in my office and thought...offices are for grown-ups! And I am the primary dinner-maker in my family and that person (in my experience) is usually a grown-up! And I'm the second oldest person in my house, the third and fourth oldest being 15 and 10 and that makes me married and a parent which makes me a grown-up! And I have a great steady job that allows me to contribute financially to my family and that makes me a grown-up!
So why is it that I feel so young at heart?
I have an office where people come and we talk through struggles they are dealing with, and often by sharing a struggle I've experienced it helps them feel free to speak more openly and honestly. I think that getting things off our chest with people worthy of hearing our story is incredibly refreshing. Getting a weight off of your shoulders is certainly going to make you feel lighter and happier.
I love cooking dinner! I wish I learned how to cook dinner earlier...that it hadn't been seen as a "grown-up" task...and so I am open and excited that my 10 year old daughter often asks to help me. She is starting small, mixing the pancake batter or putting the dry rub onto the ribs, but her small acts are a big help and a huge confidence booster for her cooking abilities! It's a fun activity that we get to do together and in those moments we aren't 10 or 40, we are two gals helping each other out in the kitchen, laughing and enjoying ourselves along the way!
Being a parent is so much fun...going to soccer games, watching movies, riding on the Ripstik (which I haven't nearly mastered yet...but I'm determined), talking about school and friendships, going on vacations, helping with homework, carting kids to and fro while listening to their music...most of the time. It's also heartbreaking at times, frustrating at times, infuriating at times. By choosing to spend more of our time celebrating laughter, song, dance, play, rest, creativity, gratitute and joy, we build a resilient spirit to get us through the harder times. (The Daring Way™ Model, Brené Brown) Laughing with my family is one of my favorite things in the whole world! Being married and ending every day holding hands on the couch, laughing with my best friend is one of the things I'm most grateful for.
And though I do have a wonderful job that allows me to contribute financially to my family, it's not just a job...I absolutely love what I do. I am reminded of this quote by Howard Thurman: “Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” By doing what I love every day I get to come alive every day! What a feeling...loving what you do and looking forward to it most days! (Not all days, mind you...)
Getting to this point in my life where I feel such inner happiness and inner peace has been a long and difficult journey at times...I've struggled with comparison, perfectionism, fear of what people think, need for certainty, anxiety and definitely taking myself too seriously and I'm so grateful for the people and experiences that have come into my life to help me get to such a fun loving place!
In what ways do you stay young at heart? What do you still need to work through to get to the place where you feel more at peace inwardly? Do you struggle with any of the struggles I mentioned above? What support do you need to get to the next step?
